Last year I was working with a client who signed-up for a teleclass on how to honor your style as an introvert.  She was the only student on the call so I shifted out of lecture mode and into a more interactive and dynamic coaching style asking Sally questions and listening carefully to her responses. She had an insight and we laughed together enjoying the lightness and learning.  After about 45 minutes Sally admitted how uncomfortable she was with all this attention.  I pointed out that was a classic introverted response.  A general unease with being in the limelight too long.  We shared a second laugh together.

Too much focus on me . . .

January has been a month of challenges requiring me to reach out for support more than I am accustomed to.  Later today I am having surgery on my hand after a skiing injury called skier’s thumb.  I actually didn’t even tell my family or best friend until yesterday.  I was simply coming out of my skin with all this attention.

And then there is public attention . . .

This reminds me of my favorite Olivia episode.  Those of you with kids may know Olivia, the sassy confident pig whose best friend Julian is an introvert, shy or both.

In this episode the school teacher announces that they are all going to sing a a solo of the song  she wrote about fruits and vegetables.  Olivia is in her element and loves the idea of being a lemon on stage for the school performance.

Julian is mortified.  He picked celery precisely because it is a bland opposite-of-attention-seeking kind of vegetable.  Now he has to dress in a celery costume and sing a solo in front of a crowd including his parents with video cameras!  Even practicing in front of Olivia and others is too nerve wrecking.  The only way he is able to pull it off the night of the performance is to sing behind the curtain.  Of course he does brilliantly and of course Olivia accidentally opens the curtain at the end and everyone claps, cheers and yes – takes pictures.

A need for privacy . . .

When we were designing our ideal kitchen I advocated for a two tiered island where the cook top would be with a raised bar.  That gave me more privacy.  I didn’t want people watching me while I cook.  My partner laughed and playfully nicknamed me “the private cooker.”

It’s not that we don’t enjoy attention. . .

We are human and all humans want to be seen and noticed.  Appreciated and adored.  Yet public or too much attention can feel like fingernails down a chalkboard.  It is simply too much!  Do you have these moments?  What are they?  Notice these moments and give yourself permission to follow Julian’s lead and “step out of the limelight.”